“Come here Peter!” The instruction was unlike any I had received from Pauline in detention in the past. This was stern and I was left in no doubt that I could not mess about. When I was standing in front of Pauline she eyed me up and down and saw me looking down at her lovely breasts. “We’ll do this properly as it’s probably our last time Peter.” Pauline reached for my tie and began to loosen it. I let her and didn’t react as she took it off and placed it on the desk. She then began to unbutton my shirt and I may have mumbled something, but again, I didn’t stop her. Soon, Pauline Manson was folding my shirt up neatly and placing it softly on her desk. Pauline wasn’t finished yet and asked me to take off my shoes, which I nervously struggled to do, but finally placed them to one side and stared at my teacher. “Years ago, if you were being punished then it would be given on the bare bottom.” Pauline already had her hands working on undoing my belt and I just let her do this. . I was hoping I would die during this operation thus joining the souls of the men I lost in Vietnam. I wanted my war to be finally over however it was to become only the beginning.I survived the operation and I would have to find another way to join my fallen comrades. I faced a major struggle in my recovery. I did not want to live and deal with what lies ahead of me which was months of therapy to regain the use of my legs and my arm. If not for Carrie being at my side, I would not be writing this today.I tried to send her away as I was unsure if I would ever walk again. I became helpless when she was with me. I had her hand me something that I could have easily reached for with my working arm. I tried to convince her I was no longer that man she had fallen in love with years ago.Carrie would not let me give up on myself or on us. She would move my legs with her hands daily bending them at my knees. I only sunk deeper into my own depression as well as into the darkness that surround.
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